love your neighbour

“you wouldn’t, wig. you wouldn’t”

it’s a question we all hear a lot really.

what it is that we invest most of our dreams into…
“what’s more important, your work overseas, or the people you love here?”

these days i’m not too sure what scares me the most.
that when i reflect on my life, i see how little of it is actually ‘me’.
that happiness isn’t a priority.
that my mind is constantly aching to become the person i wish i was…
in line with the needs of humanity.

“i suppose we all would like to believe that we listen to the people that we love. when people ask me what’s the most important thing to me… i’ll answer God, and my family and my friends. but how fucking true really is that? how many times andy, have i let my family down because i’m at an oaktree event… or studying for an exam… or on a come down from exhaustion? and i don’t regret it. at all. i should but i don’t. because if they asked me to stop, i’d do what i’ve always done… i’d ignore it. and yet, in that same breath, if anyone from oaktree asked me to give up my family: again, i’d never allow that to happen. because…. i suppose… neither are the enemy. but at the same time, i’d let go of the thing that compromised my purpose in this world”

i knew there was little sense in my rambles.

“you wouldn’t give it all up, wig…. you wouldn’t”
yes… yes i would.
i think that’s what scares me the most.
does that make me heartless.


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